One of the first things people will see when entering Thailand is the Thai greeting or Wai. Normally accompanied by pressing the hands together and placing them in front of the face and bringing the head forward and bending from the waist. This gesture has its origins from the bronze age some 4000 years ago. One of its first uses was reported to be to show you are friendly and unarmed and mean no harm.
Foreigners are forgiven many of the intricacies of this traditional greeting as although it plays a very important role throughout Thailand as well as other countries, we are not expected to fully understand it, and are therefore given some exemption in the performance of this greeting.
Accompanied by the traditional Sawasdee Kha/Khrap, the Wai has some variances in its use.
Hand position and depth of the bow indicate a persons position, either socially, corporately or age related. Khon Thai, (Thai people) have been brought up to always show respect to the elders in society, especially within ones own social and family circle, religious and royal status.
How is it used and when?
The younger will always Wai the older as a sign of respect for their age and experience. Older people do not “in general” Wai younger people except to acknowledge the Wai that was given to them.
Staff in most places will Wai to a customer or to a guest, and normally we being unused to this feel the need to fit in, so we Wai back in polite fashion. This makes the Thai people smile as actually the correct way to acknowledge this show of respect is to just nod your head in return.
A Thai person even with hands full will not neglect this duty often, and will make some effort to lower the body and nod the head even if hands are unavailable.
Thai people will always Wai family members (such as parents, aunt and uncles, relatives with older ages) when entering or leaving a house.
If someone Wai’s you, then you have to make some pretty fast calculations if you are Thai. If you get this wrong it can lead to a certain amount of loss of face (or respect).
This loss of face does not extend to foreigners though. I have performed the Wai wrongly on many occasions and sometimes I still do. I have performed this without thought. I have met one of my staff or a younger friend and greeted them first, only to be given a look of horror and the words “Khun Gary please you should know better by now”.
I clearly remember the embarrassed look on Shayne C Blossoms face when I met her for the first time, and with a great big smile performed the Wai.
Most of you will not get this look as previously stated we are forgiven many cultural errors even when we should know better.
I always love what I call the surprise Wai. Stop your car to allow someone to cross the road and they are taken by such shock the Wai is performed on the run with a look like they have won the lottery. (you do not return this Wai).
Holding open a door will bring you a Surprise Wai. Again you are not expected to return it
So for us foreigners and first time visitors some simple to follow rules are:
You are not expected to Wai but it is polite to learn how to do so.
When meeting or greeting someone older, it is your duty to perform the Wai.
When eating or shopping you do not need to Wai staff and shopkeepers otherwise you would be like a nodding dog for much of your day and it is not expected from you.
You should Wai.
When apologising for causing offence or misdemeanor with the word sorry (or kor-toat in Thai)
The Wai is always performed even by those in a hurry, if they are passing a shrine with any depiction of Buddha. There are many images and Thai people will often have a favourite that they worship more than another. (you are also exempt from this duty too).
Monks should be shown due respect. (please remember that if you are female you are forbidden from touching a monk).
A special language and Wai is performed for Royalty, in fact Thai people learn a whole new complex way of interacting with Royalty including a full change in language use.
In essence the Thai Wai is an integral part of cultural belonging and plays a very important role in Thai life.
The rest of us should not get too hung up on the Wai.
You may use it as you wish and will be forgiven for any mistakes.
The deeper the bow the deeper the respect, and placing the hands correctly ( The hands are placed slightly higher or lower depending on who is being waied) hold a cultural symbolism That will earn you a great deal of respect if used correctly.
Wai watching can be a great fun especially for those who have been before and made the same mistakes. If you want to learn then keep watching the Wai.
Author: Gary C.
Editor: Katie K.
Photo credits: https://mgronline.com/entertainment/detail/9600000074500
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